Hardcore, introverted photographer overcoming fear with vlogging

1080 608 Tim Breaseale

Yes, I am a very hardcore introvert. My camera is like my security blanket. When I am behind the camera working or just having fun, I am fine. But what happens when I get in front of the camera? What happens when I am in a group of people without my camera in hand? I block them all out, and I find myself people watching. I don’t interact. I watch. I walk around. I am by myself. This is not good for my business or even networking.

I am now trying to conquer my fear with vlogging. With my first video narrative in the can, what have I learned from this?

  • I get extremely nervous
  • I lose my concentration and stutter
  • I talk too slow
  • It’s hard to look directly into the lens
  • I fear people staring at me and judging me while I talk to my camera
  • The vlogging setup is heavy and awkward
  • There is a learning curve to editing
  • It’s difficult finding cool, royalty-free music

Now that I have a list to work on, I have a good starting point.  The first one gets me the most.  I don’t know how to control the nerves. Once the nerves go, it’s like the domino effect.  They all fall down until the situation is over.  It will be the hardest to overcome.  People staring and judging.  That one, in my mind, sounds hard to overcome, but I’m sure it will become easier the more that I am doing the videos.  I think the easier ones will be looking directly into the camera and video editing. Yes, video editing.  Get me inside away from people, and I will feel my most comfortable.

With my nervous nelly self and blunders out in internet space now, it’s time to do some correcting.  I had my iPad in hand with my notes and didn’t even read from it.  I lost concentration and blanked out and didn’t use it.  In my extreme nervousness I misspoke–I did not work with fashion designers in New York.  I interned with a famous fashion photographer in New York.  I demonstrated my vlogging setup as a  small camera, big lens, GorillaPod, and large mic.  I tested it, but found it awkward.  I ended up not using the setup at all, because it’s heavy.  I ended up using my camera on a tripod with a small video light and a Zoom H1 recorder with a Smart Lav+.  I would have mentioned that if I would have read from my notes.  Nervousness = space cadet.  I love photographing more than just characters.  That was just at the tip of my tongue and popped out, and I didn’t mention anything else.  I am a commercial and lifestyle shooter, so my photographic passion extends beyond just characters at comic-con.

I have been in a 9-5 job for many, many years.  I feel my creative juices have not been stirred during this period.  This “new adventure” I kept talking about is part of me trying to get more creative and also conquering my fear.  YouTube is a great resource for anything you want to learn about.  That’s why I am turning to YouTube to help with my fear and my creative funk.  I want to help others that are shy, closed off and fall into that introverted category.  I want to help teach, share and entertain.  I will create my video narratives and publish them to YouTube. I will add extra content on my personal blog site.

I feel like I didn’t know what I wanted to do when I was in college.  It took me a lot longer to graduate because of not knowing, and I feel like I got into photography late in the game.  Now, I feel like I am getting into videography late in the game.  I feel like I am just now trying to conquer my fear really late in my life.

If you have any question or comments, leave them below or at my YouTube channel.

Equipment I used for my video is listed below with links.  The music was made by me with the GarageBand app.  The video was edited using Adobe Premiere Pro CC (2017).

Canon 6D     http://amzn.to/2oYAwo8
Canon 40mm lens     http://amzn.to/2qt7zkl
Zoom H1     http://amzn.to/2pkwqcj
Rode Lav+     http://amzn.to/2pxMSGD
Gorilla Pod     http://amzn.to/2pxUTvo
Cheap video light     http://amzn.to/2oYEgFZ
Gitzo tripod     http://amzn.to/2pxHaEY
Rode Video Mic (did not actually use it, for looks only)     http://amzn.to/2pxTlBz

Shout outs to:
Chase Jarvis, Peter McKinnon, Sara Dietschy, Casey Neistat

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